I've been avoiding this place. I don't think I've even looked at this place since the last time I posted, over two months ago.
I think this is because life is real and it has its challenges, and being re-married has its own set of them, and I'm not exactly handling all of that like a champ all the time.
And this place feels too... I dunno... cheery?... to dump any of the not-so-cheery details.
I've been having a lot of inner turmoil about which I would truly most likely benefit from talking about, but I just can't seem to work up the courage to be that real here.
And perhaps that's not entirely accurate either. I don't really know what it is.
But what I do know is that there is something missing in myself. There's something that used to be here but isn't anymore and maybe it's more than one thing, and I haven't reconciled whether that thing is something that's not supposed to be here or something that should be but I'm not embracing, or maybe not seeing, or maybe hiding because I do see it... or something.
I miss blogging, that I know for a fact.
If anyone is reading this, if there's anybody out there, I don't know why you are, but I'm very glad that you are. Except for the bizarre on slot of pill pushing spam comment writers of late, you freaks can go away.
Tell me what to tell you. Tell me it's all okay. Tell me you won't tell my mom.
That last bit was a joke, sort of. A mad mess all its own, in my world, or mind. Whatever. I'm not meant to be an anonymous blogger, it doesn't work for me.
What's the good word? What does it all mean? Who really cares anyway, right? Those that mind don't matter <insert that brilliant Dr. Seuss quote>.